7.25.2008

Where recyclables and open containers meet face to face

Today, in an effort to uncover a possible loophole to MN Statutes Chapter 169A, which states that it is unlawful to transport an open alcohol container in a moving vehicle, I contacted the local sheriff's department at approximately 1823 hours:

Me: Hello, I am calling for a friend, and have a quick question for you.

Sheriff: Yes, ma'am?

Me: If my friend is transporting recyclables to the dump, can she be pulled over and ticketed for having an open container in her vehicle?

Sheriff: No, ma'am. The statute actually states that the container must have a measurable amount of liquid in the can/bottle.

Me: Ahhhh. But couldn't someone hurry and drink said liquid and throw offending can/bottle into the recyclables? (I am thinking that if one was so inclined, they could actually keep their recyclable bin right up front between the driver and passenger seat)

Sheriff: Ma'am, we here at the Sheriff's office are rational people. We don't just ticket people for the sake of ticketing. We take other items into account such as if the container is cold, or if we have any concerns, we may issue a breathalyser test. We would definitely ticket if there was a measurable amount of liquid in a container.

Me: Does the amount of the ticket directly correlate to the amount of measurable liquid?

Sheriff: If you're asking if we fine someone a certain amount of money for 3 oz. and a certain amount for 4 oz., the answer is no.

Me: Thank you for answering my friend's questions. I believe that is all she needed to know.

Sheriff: You're welcome, and drive safely.

Further research uncovered the fact that one state, Mississippi, has neither an open container law nor an alcohol consumption prohibition. Therefore, this blog post, and the console pictured here, is legal in the state of Mississippi. Please also note that open containers ARE legal in the passenger areas of buses, limos, taxis, and...the living quarters of motor homes (bar mobile - why hasn't it been done before?)

Author's note: This author and the No Cleaning Here website does not any way, shape, or form, support or endorse drinking and driving. This post was written strictly for the sake of humor, which is exactly what this author does support and endorse.

If you're thinking of moving to Mississippi, click Humor-Blogs.com to thank me for this good information. If not, click here.

10 comments:

SiouxsieQ said...

Mr. Siouxsie left an open (empty) beer bottle in the car the other day. Don't worry - he hadn't been drinking and driving. I think he had been mowing because the bottle had grass on it. Was he mowing with the car? Who knows what Mr. Siouxsie does, but he gets the grass mowed and the bottles picked up.

damon said...

Sometimes, in the name of recycling, you have to get ALL that darn beer out of the aluminum cans. It's for the good of our planet. ;)

Steph said...

This is off topic, but it is illegal to sell/buy a vibrator in Alabama. (Have I mentioned how much I HATED living in Alabama) Not that it really stopped people from owning them, but they had to buy them elsewhere. I was always wondering if we (errr....I mean my friend...) could get arrested for having one in the nightstand, and if she would have to go to jail and get bailed out in the middle of the night...
"What are you in for?"
"Shooting my husband in the face."
"And you?"
"Leaving my baby in a car"
Then they would gang up on me and ask me what I am in for.
"Owning a vibrator"
"Wow...that's REALLY BAD. YOU ARE SO DOING TIME FOR THAT! Hope you have a good lawyer!" Then they would cackle and laugh.

Brent Diggs said...

This is the sort of investigative reporting that I can get into:

Hard hitting, risky, and liquidly refreshing.

unfinishedrambling said...

While the post was classic, the trick to getting me to vote for you either way was even more classic. ;) It's like something I would have done.

Alice said...

Ahhh..the things we go through for the sake of our blogs. Thanks for the hot tips!

Julie in Houston said...

That's pure genius right there! I've always wondered that too. Although the officer might find it a bit strange that you are carrying the recycling container next to you in the front seat. Nice pic by the way! :) Glad I found your blog (BC). It's funny!
www.peglegstarfish.com

Steph said...
This comment has been removed by the author.
The Hypocritical One said...

I agree with Julie...genius. Just make sure you blow your burp the other way after swigging when the officer is asking you questions.

Anonymous said...

I knew my husband recycled for some reason! Ahhhaaa. That bugger.

judee